DesiDabba - Boss, Thoda Sa Roomani Ho Jaye

For once the fat host is right. Today is Rakhi ke honewalle pati ke liya dua mangne ka din hai. #rakhisawant

And it can’t get more fake than this. This is like watching silicon work its magic in real life. #rakhisawant

How come the guju guy is putting haldi and not fem fem se gori gori cream? And where the fuck are his sardar brothers friends?!#rakhisawant

Guju guys sister is cute. But looks so zonked out? Took couple of shots to bare the pain of watching her brother commit marital suicide?#rs

Overdose of overacting we are being fed by these sidey television stars. Thank god for Fatafat digestive golies. #rakhisawant

So how long will this engagement tamasha last? I give it 3 months max. Then we will have sawant crying horse how she was duped by channel.

But I guess requires talent no to make normal folks aka the boyz’s family to over act? #rakhisawant

Unwanted 72 should be titled No 1 ad on the Unwated Tele Ads List. Cheap shit. #fail

Continue reading ‘Swayamvar Commentary Twitter Style’

Let’s cut the bullshit here: Singh is Kinng is complete waste of human mindspace. Nothing new though, most Bollywood commercial films are in the same league and yet I am cent percent certain that this Kinng is going to rule the Box office for the next few weeks or perhaps months (Heyy Baby and Welcome are perfect examples).

The deal is, we seem to have a thing for bad movies… not really bad ones, like Fool and Final and that other horrendous Riteish Deshmukh one (Kya Kool Hain Hum was it?), but somehow, our spam filter seems to hit a blind spot when it comes to a bad ones. Let me explain. We’re at a stage in our viewing pattern where the bigger and more grandiose a movie seems, the more viewable we automatically think it is. That’s mostly why we loved ‘seeing’ Kabhi Khushi Kabhi Gham. Forget the fact that it was a horrible movie as storyline and acting go. There was bling, and we were dazzled.

Continue reading ‘Kinng of Bling’

It was a though choice – Will Smith’s pout or Imran Khan’s?

Ultimately what tipped the scales was that I was getting to see the newbie’s pout for only 70 bucks. So even if I didn’t it, I could have easily walked out and not felt that my day was gone, as the show was one of those illegallyhoured – 8.00 Am ones.

And guess what – I liked it. Not just the pout, but the whole movie. The cast was fresh, each character well-etched out and played equally convincing. Although it did look as though Aamir mamu has sat bhateeja down and rehearsed each dialogue/scene/cut/frame/shot/flick of the eye a million times.

Continue reading ‘Pehle Ka Naata‘

*Not for the faint hearted.

Anything and everything you look here is wrong. Catastrophe, I say. Okay maybe they got the wind factor but that’s about it. As a complete Superman buff I am appalled. But then one glance at ex hero no. 1 cum once-upon-a-time politician’s past-present fashion taste (if one may call it so), the above disaster isn’t all that surprising.

And for Ms. Katkar, anything said is less. Well that’s cause there isn’t much to say about her Bollywood career at least. Her stint in the industry was much like blink-n-u-miss kinds but role playing seemed to be her forte – She started off with playing desi ape man’s very much desi Jane and signed off with as the Jhuma Chuma aunty.

BTW I am most offended by the ‘side hip thrusting’ movement in scene 1.01 and ‘I am a bird’ bit in scene 3.16 and the ‘hop-n-squat’ movement in scene 2.36 and, uff dunk it me too grumpy to write further.

[Ps – On a similar note, check out apna Southie version of Thriller. Scary shitts no doubt.]

I’m not usually inclined to writing movie reviews, given I tried it on one of my other blogs and failed miserably to write anything interesting. But I just had to put my thoughts down on this just to remember the funny idea if not the movie.

Seen The Forbidden Kingdom as yet? Or have Iron Man, Khuda ke Liye and Race overwhelmed the once raging appetite for Kung-fu flicks. Speaking of which, where have all the Kung-fu lovers gone? Times were when Star Movies ran a series called Friday Fury telecasting the grand works of Bruce Lee and Jackie Chan. Now that’s been reduced to a once-in-a-couple-of-years Chan release or (horror of horrors) dubbed versions on Filmy.

Cadet Larvell Jones of Police Academy was an expert at imitating all sorts of noises and one of the series had him do a routine of the typical Hollywood-dubbed Chopsuey flick, delivering chop-chops and complete with un-lip-synced psuedo-Eastern wisdom like,

The snake does not bend its neck. The mongoose will still catch it!

(….or something like that)

Continue reading ‘Chopstick Slapstick’